Image by Sasin Tipchai from Pixabay
Did you know that your relationships have a higher purpose? When we think of our higher purpose in life, most often the thing we focus on is our career or occupation. While higher purpose can certainly be expressed through that, its important to realize that every experience we have has a higher purpose. Our main purpose in life is to grow spiritually, and there is no better catalyst for that than the relationships we have.
The higher purpose of our primary relationships is to help each other grow.
Every relationship, be it with your parents, friends, children, siblings or significant other, carries within it the potential for growth. Different people play different roles in our lives. Not all relationships are meant to last a lifetime. When the purpose is fulfilled the relationship usually ends. People often view an ended relationship as a failure, but that’s not the case.
When the lessons you came together to learn have been learned the purpose for the relationship has been fulfilled. Then each person can move on. Holding on to a relationship that has served its purpose can cause a great deal of misery. The length of time you are in a relationship has nothing to do with its importance in your life. Think about the things you learned from being with that person. Perhaps you learned compassion, forgiveness, patience, how to trust in yourself or the importance of self-love. Even brief associations can leave us with a new understanding, new perspective and growth. And, If you shared a loving bond, you are still connected at a higher level, even if the way your relationship looks on the outside is changed.
Other relationships do last a lifetime.
It’s important to let go of the idea that there is that one person who will give your personality everything it wants. No one can do that—nor should they! You will most often attract someone who is on a similar spiritual path, with the same lessons. You will act as mirrors to one another, reflecting back personality traits and qualities. These relationships can be quite joyful, intimate and caring, and they can also be challenging! You grow a great deal when you are challenged to love unconditionally. You learn to love what your partner is reflecting back to you—those “unloveable” traits within yourself. The things that irritate you the most in your partner are the same qualities that you find difficult to love within yourself. As you find unconditional love for your partner, you learn to love all of yourself.
It’s not all about the challenges.
You can also grow from experiencing the deep, loving bond you have within a relationship. You learn the feeling of being connected on a profound level. This can be experienced with a spouse, a child, a sibling or a friend. Our best friends often play a significant role in our lives. You can be a support for each other and feel free to relax and have fun together! We’re meant to be happy and enjoy the journey.
Even in seeming tragedy we can find growth and joy. One of my favorite mystery authors, Louise Penny, revealed that her husband had developed dementia. She wrote so movingly about learning to appreciate being in the present moment and how they could still laugh together. The depth of their love was unaltered. She also learned the importance of community and how many people were happy to support her and her husband in many ways through that difficult time.
All of the relationships we have in our lives give us the opportunity to open our heart centers even more. In so doing, we grow spiritually, experience more love for ourselves and others and live with more joy.
