“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” ~ Marcel Proust
Are you looking at what’s going right in your life or at what’s going wrong? For most people, their default way of thinking is to notice all the things that are not working in their lives, and all the annoying things about situations and people–and even themselves. This is a formula for the misery that rules many people’s lives.
This kind of thinking is actually wired into us from our early ancestors. In prehistoric times, when people were trying to survive long enough to raise offspring, being constantly on the lookout for life-threatening situations made sense. Now, however, we’re not in constant danger of being eaten by large predatory animals but we’re still wired to be on the lookout for negative situations. In her book Happy for No Reason, Marci Shimoff quotes brain researcher Dr. Rick Hanson as saying our brains are “velcro for negativity and teflon for positivity.” Our negative experiences stick to us like velcro and the positive ones slide away like they are on teflon.
The good news is, our brains have the quality of neuroplasticity, which simply means we can teach an old dog (or brain) new tricks. We have control over where we choose to place our awareness and by consciously choosing to look for what is good and working well in our lives we can change our focus, re-wire our brains, shift our mood and actually change our reality.
As we ask ourselves the question: “Am I looking for what’s right or am I looking for what’s wrong?” we can shift how we view the world. We can see our situation from a new, more empowered perspective. There is always something that is going right. You’re still here, after all. When we shift to noticing what’s working, we invite the universe to bring more good to us. This is a basic principle of law of attraction–practicing gratitude and appreciation. If you are reading this, it means you can see, you have the ability to read, you have the means to purchase a computer or access to a library. These are wonderful gifts! Your heart is pumping, your lungs are breathing. Today I walked outside, heard the birds and smelled honeysuckle wafting through the air. I was filled with gratitude! My hearing works, my nose works! I get to experience these wonderful sensations as a result!
Looking for what’s right takes practice, just like any new thing we are learning. The payoff is huge, however! When we train ourselves to notice what’s working in our lives as our new default, we feel strong, confident and happy. When we notice what’s wrong, we feel disappointment, resigned or even fearful. When we look for what’s going right, we begin to realize that we are not victims. What’s going wrong is not outside of ourselves, but is due to the lens through which we view the world. We can make a good argument that the other person or circumstance is wrong. It can really seem that way. However, when we look for what’s going right–what’s there to appreciate–we empower ourselves to take responsibility for the only thing we have control over–ourselves and how we choose to direct our thoughts.
This is an important question to ask ourselves if our intention is to live joyfully. How do we view the world? What would happen if we looked for the good in our co-workers and neighbors? What if we saw them as the spiritual beings they are and their purpose was to bring us wisdom in some way? What is working in our relationships with our spouses? What are the highest and best attributes that we love in them? As we focus on what’s working how will they show up for us?
My challenge to you is to start practicing this now. Begin to notice your thoughts and the direction they’re going. Are you looking for what’s right or what’s wrong in your life?
I’d love to hear the results you experience from this practice in the comments below! If you’d like more support in your journey you can sign up for your free strategy session and I’d be happy to speak with you.
